Now, Halloween is my favorite holiday. I always put a lot of effort into the whole event. The weekend before, I went to Screams Haunted Houses in Waxahachie, TX which was fantastic. I was pretty sure everything was going great this season. Halloween day hits & everyone at work loves my costume & I'm told I'm sure to win, as there were very few costumes worn. I dressed as Captain Jack Sparrow & put a lot of work into the outfit & character.
Then came the contest... (Play Price is Right losing music here....)
I entered the costume contest at work & did not even make the finals. Below are the other entries.
Here's White Trash guy, who also did not make it into the finals.
It's Dolly & Kenny (who couldn't keep his moustache on)
These 2 won 3rd place (He is a director & she is the CEO's admin)
This is the CAO's admin dressed as the CAO in 2nd place.
In 1st place was a team effort for 101 Dalmations. OK, I'll give it to them. Teams always win out.
Next are some pics of my Halloween decorations at home.
Here are a couple of tin Haunted Houses that light up with tealights.
And here are my Jack-O-Lanterns ala Friday the 13th. I entered these in a carving contest, of which I didn't win or place as well....
A bloody bride at the door...
Blair Witch sticks hanging from the trees...
A view of the front door, with a demon in the window... (I'll get to the whole demon thing in a minute.)
A few more decorations in the courtyard...
So then I head home to prepare for the trick-or-treaters & my fog machine blows up. Then I only got about 8 knocks at the door all night. BUMMER! But my next door neighbor comes over with his son & procedes to tell me that my decorations are great, but the demon in the window is a "bit disconcerting..." DISCONCERTING????
I'm about to blow off his remark when he tells me that he needs my help this year to hang angels all around the neighborhood for Christmas this year, which I found a bit disconcerting. He then tells me that he needs my help because his wife is unable to help this year because she is pregnant with twins. To this I respond with congratulations. He then tells me that the twins are not theirs. I look very confused at this point, to which he explains that they are surrogating for a good friend & also adds "This sure has been a DRY SPELL for me lately." Now I'm finding the whole thing EXTREMELY DISCONCERTING!!!! The guys gonna make comments about a rubber demon in my window, then force me to hang angels & listen about how his best friend's semen was turkey-basted into his wife & how he now is going through a dry spell... What does he want from me, a handjob?
Needless to say, this Halloween was a bust & now I'm also kind of freaked by the neighbors...
5 comments:
Dude, your costume would've won first-place at my office, hands-down, as would've your pumpkins (those looked professionally done, BTW). And your house is awesome, and in a good location ... but you have some shitty neighbors!!
As do I.
Muffin, your decorations are AMAZING!! Your costume, too. It's fucked that you didn't win but everybody was probably just jealous. I am so going to be Dolly next year. I already have the boobs down, I just need to work on the hair.
You should tell your neighbor that you like cock. He'll probably leave you alone which would make you a lot happier.
PS. 101 Dalmations is so 1996.
AWWWW!!!
wow i was seriously impressed by your capn jack sparrow. damn! that is good shit. you totally won my halloweenie contest!
my hallows eve sucked also. maybe next year we can show these fuckers whats what.
xo
chadzilla
Sorry to hear that your Halloween was a bust, I know that it's your favorite one of the year.
The whole thing with your neighbor is truly disturbing. O.O
yeah, those costumes were quite whack compared to yours.
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